With Mother’s Day this past weekend, there have been many DIPG moms that have shared their most intimate thoughts and feelings about what motherhood means to them on their child’s website. I became overwhelmed with emotion as I read -- understanding and relating to their similar experience of becoming a mom and then losing such an integral part of your being.
For me motherhood was, from a very young age, something I always wished would happen. I dreamed of having children and what I would name them…I thought about how many kids I would have and whether they would be boys or girls. I remember that for a time, when I was asked what I wanted to be when I grew up, I responded with “a hospital administrator”. Secretly, however, I simply wanted to be a mom. I have always wanted to be a mom…maybe that is one of the reasons I followed my heart and became a teacher instead of a hospital administrator. That way, even if I did not become a mom, I would still have children to “mother” in my life.
It was when I became a mom that I felt truly complete…by having children and being married to Brian, I was living my lifelong dream. Colin, Garrett and Grace created pure joy in my life. Then, when Grace was diagnosed with a terminal illness, I felt that my dream was being taken from me…from us. It could not be that this was part of my dream! This was not the dream I had imagined. Over the past three years, I have come to realize that I am continually blessed by my children, and even though Grace is no longer physically with us, I will always be her mom. Although my journey through motherhood has included the most intense heartache a mother could ever experience, at the same time, my heart continues to grow in ways I never could have imagined.
This May, along with celebrating moms, I urge you to wear gray for National Brain Tumor Awareness month. Visit www.reflectionsofgrace.org and click on the “May is National Brain Tumor Awareness Month” slide to find out what you can do to promote awareness and help us to spread the word about brain tumors. Wear your gray ribbon pins, share Grace’s story, help sell Candy For A Cure, or sponsor a Wear Your Heart On Your Sleeve day at your workplace and pray for those families whose lives are forever changed due to a brain tumor.
“I have loved you with an everlasting love…”